Perfect Liars Club
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February 5, 2020 | The Bier Baron Tavern & DC Comedy Loft
Perfect Liars Club tears it up... again.

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Despite all the distractions of a very busy news week -- State of the Union dustups, impeachment acquittals, global pandemics -- DC's best and brightest packed the beer can adorned halls of Dupont Circle's Bier Baron Tavern and DC Comedy Loft for the February installment of everyone's favorite "storytelling show with a twist" Perfect Liars Club.

A quartet of first-rate storytellers was assembled to hypnotize, hoodwink, and hornswoggle the sold-out crowd with their four hard-to-believe tales. Was there an audience member shrewd enough to debunk the liar before nary a question was asked and a vote was tallied? Only time would tell. But first, the stories...
  • Did the discovery of Maryam's stash of half-eaten chicken nuggets in her bedroom closet help reveal the fact that she suffered from anosmia -- an inability to smell?
  • Was Keith hired to surreptitiously photograph a wedding proposal at the Vietnam Memorial that went unexpectedly and horribly awry? 
  • Did Stacey incur $28K in LexisNexis fees at her first job out of college, searching for dirt on her ex-boyfriends?
  • Was Sufian -- a recent emigre to the United States -- tasked by his Circassian countrymen to track down Mel Gibson and convince him to produce and direct a Braveheart-inspired film about their homeland?
The frenetic energy of the crowd swelled with the conclusion of each story. And just before intermission began, four confident contenders confidently conveyed why -- in their humble opinion -- bragging rights for the month would soon be theirs.

The interrogation round provided ample fodder for the undecided in the room to consider. For example:
  • Why didn't Maryam just throw her chicken nuggets away at school?
  • How long did it take Keith to cycle from College Park to the Vietnam Memorial, as he had claimed in his story?
  • Did Stacey's boss ever ask her what she was searching for on LexisNexis?
  • Did Sufian's fellow countrymen seriously think that living in America increased his chances of encountering Mel Gibson?
The vote proved to be a lopsided affair between the sexes, with Stacey and Maryam garnering 34 and 30 votes, respectively, to Keith's eighteen and Sufian's six. 

As the mighty rumble of a drumroll echoed off the walls of the venue, the four storytellers jostled back and forth, tantalizing the tormented crowd, until one single storyteller stood before them all.

A beaming Keith sauntered to the very edge of the stage, a Perfect Liar unspotted. And in the crowd, Emma grinned from ear-to-ear, overjoyed with the knowledge that she had laid claim to a month's worth of liar-spotting bragging rights.​ And that's a fact.

Until next time, friends and lovers. 
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